Some of the crap you'll find:
GoHome
Let's Try Beer
Cuckoo canucks
Horoscopes
Comments, Concerns and Other General Nastiness
Email
 | Chock full of melt-in-your-mouth goodness
Random Canadian,
As you opened this letter, surely the words "Drat, foiled again," crept into your Canuck brain. I understand. Perhaps a slight chill overcame you and an angry look flashed across your brow. "That damned American will never give up the good fight," you thought to yourself. And I say, no, old warrior. I will not. No battle shall ever be won on our soil.
I know not how long we shall wage this war. Is it a lifelong battle, or will you and the brave men and women of Canada raise the flag of surrender in the near future? I suggest the latter. Because I assure you, pesky Canadian, that we will not abandon our way of life that easily. Our founders did not slaughter the natives of this land so that we would simply give it away generations later. We didn’t buy Manhattan for $26 in trinkets just to sell it to you for a lightweight Canadian coin with a moose on it.
Again, I must tell you that I admire your persistence. It is not every day that one finds an adversary so driven and focused on a goal, and you are to be respected for that. Even if your goal is the eventual ruin of democracy and capitalism as we know it. My hat is off to you, but I am still fighting the fight. As I forever will.
As usual, you will find your own currency enclosed, in the form of a Canadian quarter (or Moose Money, as I call it), along with our currency. Please note that this is one of the nifty new U.S. quarters of the New Jersey variety. Please filter it into your monetary system so that the war can continue. Fight on if you wish, Random, but we shall be victorious.
Letter 1
Letter 2
|
